My Fear About My Daughter Not Liking School

            Both my children started school last week. It was a bitter sweet feeling because I have stayed home with both my children until they were both ready for school. When AJ Started school three years ago, I still had Cianna with me. I would go to work  at night while daddy watched her, and come home in the morning to be with her.  Cianna started Pre-K this year and it has not been all peaches and cream. 
            About three hours after daddy dropped her off, I received a phone call from the school. The assistant principle told me that she was crying, scratching her body, she took her socks and shoes off, and she refused to put them back on. Knowing that she has eczema, which gets really bad when she is irritated, I asked the assistant principle if she could use some petroleum jelly to sooth her skin, she said they did not carry it in the school. So I drove to the school -7 minutes away - to help with the situation. When I got to the school she was sitting in a blue chair by herself crying. I took her to the school lobby and rubbed her prescribed medication on her skin and put on a different pair of shoes that would allow her feet to air out. I spent 45 minutes in the school trying to get her to go back to class. She refused.  She told me that the teacher doesn't like her, that she was mean to her. I told her that the teacher was my friend and her response was, "but she is not mine!".  
I went and sat in the class with her. When it was time for her to go on the playground, I went with her.  As soon as she started playing, I grew some wings and flew to the car. I went home hoping that nobody calls me to go get her.  The next three days that follow were the same story, with the exception that they kept her in school. She came home one day and told me that her teacher told her to dry it up when she was crying:-), which the teacher later told my husband, too. I started to fear that she did not like school.

A few things that we did to make her stay in school and helped me with my anxiety:

  1. The first day I went to the school I let her stay. She almost got me, but it did not happen. I even thought about homeschooling her. The thought that kept dancing in my head was that if I take her home with me today, she will expect me to do the same thing tomorrow, and the day after that. 
  2. Her teacher was AJ's teacher two years ago. She knows how we are with our kids and we know how good she is at her job. We told her the same thing we told her when AJ started school, " Let him know who is the boss." Cianna is one of the bossiest 4-year-olds I know. Letting her know who is in charge from day one is the best way to deal with her.
  3. I understood her frustration. I did not try to make her more upset by raising my voice at her or ordering her around.  She is the baby in the family and it was her first time being with a lot of strangers for a long period of time. So I could relate to that! It was like her first day at a new job.
  4. Of course she had her favorite treats when she got home from school.
  5. We let her pick her own outfit because she loves clothes. Whatever she was in the mood to wear was what she wore. 
  6. The most important thing is that daddy doesn't have to sneak out of the school anymore. Now they have their little goodbye routine.
         It's only the second week of school and things are already better. She has new friends and she loves learning new things. Her favorite part is still being on the playground, but we are working on getting her to love books like AJ does. I was afraid that she wouldn't like school because the first few days she wanted to stay home and watch TV. She cried when I mentioned homework, and that really scared the living daylight out of me.
          So if your child is having these problems, be patient. He or She will come around. If your child had these problems in school, lets talk about it! How did your child come around? What did you do?



  1. I am not a mom but I imagine how tough it must be...I am sure you´re a great parent and will do just the right thing!


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