The first time I cried uncontrollably was when my older sister died. My sister's boyfriend (at that time) had to carry me out of the church. I missed the whole ceremony. I could not understand why mother never cried. In fact, she was the only one who did not cry. I guess some people deal with pain differently. My sister died when she was 29 years old. She had a complicated disease; one of the ones that doctors cannot diagnose. Memories of her kept popping in my head. She never had her own children, but she became the mother of four siblings when my mom left Haiti to come to the US in 1985. She was my mother. She taught me how to cook, braid hair, and she took my best-kept secret to her grave. I mourned her death for years after the funerals.
The second time I cried was not in public; well, sort of. I was praying in my closet and I started crying from out of no where. I did not realize that I was screaming until my husband entered the room. He held me without asking what in the Barnacles -in Spongebob's language- was wrong with me. It was the kind of crying that I needed to do. Crying replaced the words that I could not find to express my anger toward my father. He destroyed my teenage years, and he was about to do the same to my marriage. My anger was the baggage that I brought into my marriage. My husband and I could not get along after we moved into our first house, and I thought it was his fault. I was the problem. God showed me that day that it was okay to cry. I needed it. I left all my anger in that room that day. How I got out of control until my husband heard me is still a mystery to me.
Now I cry out to God every time I feel overwhelmed. He always sends me a helper somehow. Most of the time it is that little voice inside me, a gut feeling that whispers, "Everything is going to be okay. Trust me." Sometimes it is a phone call from my sister, or a rose and a bottle of Pinot Noir from my husband. There is nothing shameful about crying. You may cry until you lose control, but that does not mean that you are weak. It only means that you are getting rid of the old and you are making room for the new. If crying is all you feel like doing at a certain point in your life, do it! Cry in the shower, in your closet, or in public if you cannot control it. It is okay to cry! Those who say crying is a sign of weakness have certainly never experienced it. So they have no idea what they are talking about.
Do certain movies make you emotional?